Better late than never

It's been a while since I've had laptop in lap and even longer since I've written in my blog. Making an installment in the "Only Good Things" blog has been just a tiny bit unrealistic to me lately. Certainly, lots of good things have come my way these past few weeks, but they have been somewhat overshadowed by the hecticness (new word for Webster) of the holiday season, not to mention the surges of grief that manage to creep up on me on a regular (yet not conveniently timed) basis. I have found myself, on more than one occasion, falling apart at the most inopportune moments, such as one day while I was doing some business in the bank. The poor teller didn't know what to think so she asked me if I was crying because I was afraid they wouldn't take good care of the money I was depositing. I'm sure she thought I was a nut case until I explained that my dad had died just a couple of weeks ago and that was why I was spewing snot and tears all over the counter. The survelience camaras got some delightfull footage I'm sure. Oh well. The strangest thing to me is that I get paid to provide counseling and support to others who are grieving. I give them some pretty darn good advice and support, yet for the life of me right now I cannot seem to practice what I preach. I look at myself in the mirror and wonder if I have really known what I have been talking about for all of these years. One good thing to come out of all of this is that I will certainly have more compassion and empathy for the people I work with.

Speaking of work, I will be going back to work the first week of January. I'm sure that it will be overwhelming after being off for the last two months. I'm looking forward to seeing my co-workers, but I have gotten pretty used to living a life of leisure. I love being at home and being able to devote more time to my family. It has been fun picking Tucker up after school in the afternoons and chatting about his day. When I'm working it just seems like everything is rush, rush, rush. I have realy enjoyed having time to relax and not feeling like there just isn't enough time in the day to get everything done. Oh well, I guess it's time to go back to the real world.

As for the tachycardia issues, no big change really, some days are better than others. The Metoprolol works pretty well but I still have some episodes in the 120's and 130's, but it usually calms down after a bit and then I'm OK for a while. Haven't been back to the ER for six weeks or so, and that's a good thing. I see the Cardiologist again in a couple of weeks, I'm sure she's not going to have much to offer me especially since I haven't exactly been totally complient with her orders. I am supposed to be going to the gym every single day because getting my heart rate up on purpose is supposed to make my resting heart rate lower than it is now. My resting heart rate is in the 90's and apparently that isn't a great thing, at least not over a long period of time. At first I was doing the gym thing pretty regurlarly (for a couple of weeks anyway), then I sort of just stopped going. Of course, that was about the time my dad got sick and I was making several trips a week up to Mineral after work and on the weekends. Anyway, I'm certain that she isn't going to have a lot of smypathy for me in terms of my heart rate issues because I haven't exactly held up my end of the deal. We'll see.

Since I've been off I have had time to do some fun things like baking and sewing. I made my mom a little quilted throw for Christmas. I'll attach a picture since she has it now and it seeing it here won't ruin the surprise. I'm not quite ambitious enough to take on a full size quilt so I thought I'd start small. It worked out OK, especially since the person I was making it for is rather small herself. She told me she was cuddled up under it tonight, watching TV. I'm glad you like it mom.

In addition to the quilt I made a whole slew of dish towels with little appliqued birds on them, as well as bunch of pot holders and some aprons (none of which I took photos of). Everyone at work got homemade gifts this year and I have to say that it was so much fun making them. Sadly, my sewing days will be over soon, there won't be time because my next class starts around the time I go back to work. If only I could figure out how to read a textbook and knit or sew at the same time. Hmm.

Happy New Year everyone.